Few mistakes of 2008

After being accused of cheating during the previous post, the beast has decided to silent his critics. And so it begins…

1. The beast giving his practical file clandestinely to KK which meant he was accused of treachery and was banished by the Civilians.
2. PV and AA getting drunk and uttering the truth, the only reason they have befriended the beast is that he is the only person who can get them into Govind Bhawan (the best hostel of IIT Roorkee) for the next three years.
3. John Terry slipping and missing the penalty which cost Chelsea the UEFA Champions League and a possible FIFA Club World Cup trophy and Jynja thousand bucks (poor guy lost the bet).
4. Pinky’s grades being wrongly entered into the academic database of IIT Roorkee, which meant that the non-deserving Beast gets a branch change.
5. The beast putting on braces on his teeth which meant no football for atleast six months.
6. Real Madrid forward Robinho signing for Manchester City instead of Chelsea, and thus, virtually spoiling his football career (repeating what David Beckham did to himself by signing LA Galaxy).
7. The beast attending Kaleidoscope (the fashion parade of the IIT Delhi fest), which meant no mobile network and the beast losing his only chance of meeting his INSATIABLE (she was finding it difficult to contact me).
8. The beast eating the deadly cassata on his birthday with a few friends that resulted in all getting ill and fun of THOMSO getting spoiled (almost everyone was down with fever or running nose).
9. Timo Glock fumbling at the last corner of the Brazilian GP that allowed Lewis Hamilton to overtake him and beat Felipe Massa for the crown of the F1 Champion by a single point.
10. The beast’s decision to join GANGWARS on facebook and getting seriously addicted to it which meant he spoilt his Solid Mechanics paper and thereby, his CGPA.
11. The beast falling off the stairs and deciding to join the BLOGGER, which meant people have to waste their “precious” time reading crap.
12. The beast not being loyal to his mother and deciding to go to Amritsar for the weekend, a trip which ended with an overnight wait at the Roorkee railway station in the chilly winters. ( Sorry, this one happened in January this year).

P.S. I love you is a must movie to watch.

Quote of the Day :: First you eat, then you beat and then you booze. Come on, Jawahar.

Girls only....

My earlier posts were guy-centric and people started doubting me. Someone has very correctly said “Shak, what the (beep) “. So the beast has decided to write something for the girls too.

TOP TEN REASONS TO DATE AN IITIAN……
1. The world does revolve around us... We pick the coordinate system.
2. Find out what those other buttons on your calculator do.
3. We know how to handle stress and strain in our relationships.
4. Parents will approve.
5. Help with your math homework.
6. Can calculate head pressure.
7. Looks good on a resume.
8. Free body diagrams.
9. High starting salary.
10. Extremely good looking.

TOP TEN REASONS NOT TO DATE AN IITIAN……
1. T-shirt and jeans are their formal dress. Hot dog and a six-pack is their seven-course meal.
2. The only social life known of is to post and talk on the net.
3. Flames like a monster and speaks like a pussycat.
4. Works from 6:30am to 7:30pm daily. No morning kisses and no evening walks.
5. No matter how hard you cry and how loud you yell, he just sits there calmly discussing your emotion in terms of mathematical logic.
6. Only listens to classic rock and Enrique.
7. Touches his car more often than you.
8. Talks in acronyms.
9. Can't leave that damn pencil off his ear for a minute.
10. Will file a divorce if you call him in the middle of debugging.

P.S :: No offence. The author doesn’t aim to hurt the sentiments of anyone.

Quote of the Day :: You can’t spell Geek without EE.

What if an IITian goes for MTV Roadies interview…..

No doubt they’ll clear the GD round (come on, don’t you give me that look), the focus here is what will happen when they face the twin bald duo of Raghu and Rajiv.

 

Why should an IITian be a Roadie??

1.       They have that attitude which a roadie should have.

2.       They believe in team-work.

3.       For them, work (read task) is the ultimate seduction.

4.       They are pretty good in politics.

5.       Most of them are single.

6.       They are manipulative, they know how and when to use the brain.

7.       They are good abusers.

8.       They always have a plan B.

 

Why shouldn’t an IITian be a roadie??

1.       They are the laziest ass on the earth.

2.       They are extremely aggressive.

3.       They drive, but only a bicycle.

4.       They have other useful jobs to do.

5.       They are not dumb.

6.       They are not fitness freaks.

7.       They don’t feel that GAYs are mentally retarded.

8.       They plan and then they work.

 

There are equal numbers of valid reasons for and against the motion. At the end of the day (auditions instead), Raghu and Rajiv will make the final call.

 

P.S. The post does not aim to offend anyone, it just tells the truth.

 

Quote of the Day :: I don’t discriminate between people, it’s just  that I hate a few of them.