Yes, She is right… Commitment sucks….

Lately, I have been trying to hit on my classmate of yester-years. She kept on telling me why she doesn’t need a lover giving valid and convincing reasons but I was unable to digest them. But, this recent trip to Chandigarh and Ludhiana with my newly committed batchmates, compelled me to stumble upon her thoughts. Scratching my head a little, I made the following conclusions:

1. Sitting at a bar and watching a Ukrainian belly dancer dance, you don’t have to seek her permission to drink and don’t have to lie to her that it’s the television that is making that noise.
2. When you are not selected for the second round of interviews, you have ‘n’ shoulders to cry on than only one.
3. And when you are selected for the second round of interviews, you have ‘n+1’ people congratulating you, than only one.
4. You can freely roam in shorts and get clicked without thinking much about your appearance and what would be her response when I post hem on Fb, orkut, etc.
5. Your phone can work for two complete days and you don’t have to ask your un-committed friend for his mobile phone batteries.
6. While travelling, you don’t have to ask your friends to shut up, just so that your chat isn’t disturbed.
7. You can spend freely than compromising on fooding and lodging, in order to save money for phone recharge on roaming.
8. You call her very late in the night to talk to her about your feelings only to find her phone picked up by her ex, whom she accidentally ran into at the bar, and is planning to give it a second chance.
9. And her very favorite, (p.s. I like her for this), “Boyfriends may come and boyfriends may go, but a true friend like you will go on forever”.

P.S. There is a thin line of distinction between being single and being committed and I have walked on either sides of it.

P.P.S. I like this state of drunkenness.

P.P.P.S. I won’t repent writing this, during and after the hangover.

It will be me....

Lost in the ashes of time, i find myself walking alone in this crowd,
On paper, i have so many friends, but in reality, I only have this bottle of wine.
Started this journey holding her hand, but she left me alone in this materialistic world,
I am finding it difficult to absorb their prowess, and coupled with this emptiness,
I felt like sleeping and sleeping forever......

But a little of his dope, gave me a ray of hope,
I use to see the world with two eyes,
and now winking with the third one,i came to know that,
This world is an illusion and i was the Fallen,
Awakened to return them back, what they have given to me..
Certainly it won't be my finger, or any of my racist remarks,
It will be me, it will be me, it will be me......

Potential Suitors

Once upon a time in the cursed R-Land, was a city of male virgins, having two major clans: The Mechatronix – capable of switching between human and machine forms and the Induschrones – who were half humans and half machines, and had an industrial background. Also, in the city was a young, naïve bimbo named Desire having a charm capable of making even the God’s to stare at her.

She was one of a kind and her beauty was admired by all, ranging from the oldies to the younglings. Everyone wanted to be with her. Also, there was a prophecy about her that the “ONE” who wins her heart won’t die a virgin, a feat that eluded them. This myth introduced a little anarchy in the city, upset the established order, leading to a chaos. The two clans, which worked together for years were divided and gradually their relationships abated. Also, within the Induschrones, inter-personal rivalry could be seen.

Efforts were made to pursue her and be the “one”. While the mighty Mechatronix nominated their valiant soldier TaTaScho as the perfect and potential suitor, the lecherous Induschrones were staining themselves with blood as all but one wanted to be the “one”. The race, indeed a quagmire, resulted in much heartbreak and reactions like “Why did you do this to me?”

As time went by, the lecherous suitors pursuing her started backing out as they could see the wrinkles on her face or were unable to fulfill her lust for power and money. The Awesome Blossom Secy, who came so far but faltered in the end, was so frustrated by the race that he was about to violin out his arm with a blade, only to be rescued by the Beast. Desire always hated the Beast as he conspired against her, thereby, threatening her dominance.

The race that started with so many suitors finally reaches the final stage. He, who gets the highest PPO, wins ‘her’ hand and will be the one.

Meet the Prondi's

JEE result is out and fachchas will be coming to the cursed R-land (you will come to know why I used the word cursed the very first day you will reach there). So, I thought about this noble idea to write about my branchmates and make the fachchas conversant with the Prondi’s (especially the 3^rd year Production and Industrial janta). So now I present to you that various prondi’s(in ascending order) and their famous dialogues…

1.       Ahuja :: Ahuja Abhishek Dinesh :: Oye sone de yaar, Oye attendance ho gayi kya??
2.       Costa :: Akanksha Koshta :: Koi shikanji pila do yaar…
3.       Bonta :: Anant Saxena :: Kya mast movie thi yaar, Maze hi aagaye....
4.       Pandey :: Ankit Pandey :: Abe Bonta class aa jaaya kar, warna back lag jaayegi....
5.       Ankush :: Ankush Agarwal :: Abhi audio ka kaam hai.. 
6.       Nasa :: Anshul Nasa :: Koi paise de do, Baniye bikhte hai….
7.       Bihar :: Avinash Kumar :: Abey yaar….
8.       Bora :: Dinesh Vohra :: Oye, puchkindar….
9.       Topper :: Gaurav Garg :: Arey yaar, aisi baat kardi….
10.       Gulzi :: Gulzar Singh :: Kyun, aisa kyun…
11.       Harshvardhan :: Bahut phislan hai yaar, and yeh jhute….
12.       Kaku :: Himanshu Bansal :: Maayayo….
13.       KP :: Karanpreet :: Oye maachis hai kya…..
14.       Kundan :: Hahahahahaha…
15.       Lalit :: Aap kaise ho….
16.       Lucky :: Lokesh Gulati :: Main toh sabko karta hoon, tujhe hi dard kyun hota hai...
17.       Harsha :: M. Harshvardhan :: U r strictly insane….
18.       Manoj :: Thik hai yaar…..
19.       Gupta :: Mohit Gupta :: Oye, koi ladki de do yaar… 
20.       Redda :: Mohith Reddy :: Tum log proxy toh maar diya karo…..
21.       Madan :: Neeraj Madan :: (never heard him and if you do, let me know)… 
22.       JB :: Nishant Kumar :: Yaar, CL chal raha hai, sponsorship laani hai…. 
23.       Zuba :: Nitish Kumar :: Tum c*****3 ho…..
24.            Parmar :: Rahul Parmar :: Arey yaar, yeh kaam bhi karna hai…..
25.       The legendary Pinky :: Piyush Tariyal :: Oye Costa, copy de naa……
26.       Prateek Rai:: (I am too afraid to write about him and you be too)
27.       TCS :: Pulkit Vashishtha :: Yaar, IMG ka kaam tha….
28.       Rajveer :: Arey yaar, time hi nahi hai nahaane ka…
29.       Bhaiya :: Shivam Saxena :: Sajni pass bulao na, yeh hi ab kehna hai ab kehna hai…..
30.       Bhaat :: Suprabhat Tiwari :: Don’t you dare say anything about Chelsea....
31.       Bhola :: Vineet Bhola :: Aaye maze….
32.       Wipe-in :: Vipin Verma :: Oye chod, dard ho raha hai…..
    

 

P.S. No offences to anyone…..

 

Quote of the Day :: Living on Earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the sun

The last time He saw the stars

There was a time when he desperately waited for his dad to return from office so that they both can go up to the terrace and count the stars. And now, there is a time when he still waits for his dad to return from the office so that he can drop him to his friend’s home as they both have to make a presentation that is supposed to be submitted the next day. Yesterday he met that same old friend of his who told him, “Great was the time when getting high meant on a swing. When drinking meant apple juice, when dad was the only hero, when love was mom’s hug and when dad’s shoulder was the highest place on Earth. When your worst enemies were your siblings, when the only thing that could hurt were skinned knees, when the only things broken were your toys and when goodbyes only meant till tomorrow!” But now, he is so busy that he doesn’t even have the time to relax. After listening to him, he asked himself, when did he last saw the stars and after thinking for a while, his inner voice replied, “It was during the winters of Class IXth”. After listening to this, he asked his inner voice, “Why?” and it gave him the reasons.

 

He came to class Xth and his parents started pressurizing him to study so that he could beat that score which his cousin has got and emulate him by getting himself admitted to the country’s best school. Also his teachers wanted him to score well so that they can add another name to the list of their best students. As a result, Studies became his ultimate seduction. He studied day and night, and he managed to stand up to his parent’s expectations and was admitted to that school. He still dreamed of counting the stars some day.

 

In that school, he came across the best of students which increased the competition level. He started believing in himself. His greed increased and he worked even harder so that he could make it to that college about which, his father always discussed with him when they use to count the stars. He was a brilliant student. His parents, his relatives, his teachers and his friends had high expectations from him and just to stand up to their expectations, he burnt the midnight oil. He was so preoccupied with books that he doesn’t have the time to even dream about going to the terrace and counting the stars.

 

His hard-work paid off and he made it to that college. The school life had made him so greedy that he always wanted to be the best. Since, he wasn’t God-gifted so he had to work and work hard and even harder. In the day, he’ll be attending the lectures. In the afternoon, he’ll be on the phone discussing about his project with his friends. In the evening, people can find him on the football field, saving goals for his team. In the night, he’ll be flirting with the guitar while rehearsing with his band. At the stroke of the midnight hour, he’ll be in his senior’s room playing online games and beyond that stroke; he’ll be snorting in his room. Now, he doesn’t even remember that there is a sky above and that he use to count the stars.

 

 Although his life has become monotonous and mechanical and he himself petulant, but he still is incredulous about it. The strains have improved and with these strains, came the stresses.  Perhaps other things have taken over him and it seems he has no time to count the stars.

 

But who exactly is this he?? ‘He’, here refers to you, me and every other teenager who is mentally tired, stressed out and wants a big break from his life but finding it hard to accept this. The “so called” Gen-X is working really hard to survive in this competition oriented scenario. It seems we are raising a generation of burnt out teenagers. This also reminds me of Charles Darwin’s theory of ‘Survival of the Fittest’ but if the survival is proving so costly, I’ll rather prefer to remain unfit then stressing out now so that I could die strain-lessly.

 

P.S :: I am not a racist but a colour blind who can’t see black.

 

Quote of the Day:: Will the real fake IPL player, please stand up.....

Love Story of Root Three

Though the poem is not completely his original composition but still he is posting it because unlike Pheobe Buffay, whenever he walks, he doesn’t hear his converse saying “Not Mine, Not Mine”. The beast claims that the first two stanzas are “Not mine, not not mine” but the last one is “Certainly mine, yes it’s mine”. So, here we go::

 

I fear that I will always be,

A lonely number like root three,

A three is all that’s good and right,

Why must my three remain out of sight?

Beneath a viscous square root sign,

I wish instead I were a nine,

For nine could thwart this evil trick,

With just some quick arithmetic,

I know I’ll never see the sun,

As 1.7321,

Such is my reality,

A sad irrationality.

 

When dark, wait what is this I see,

Another square root of a three,

Has quietly come waltzing by,

Together now we multiply,

To form a number we prefer,

Rejoicing as an integer,

We break free from our mortal bonds,

And with a wave of magic wands,

Our square root signs become unglued,

And love for me has been renewed.

 

Yesterday, I woke up with a nightmare,

Where,

The other square root of the three,

Found someone big and better like the three root three,

It seems she got something changed,

I lost someone special, while it was he who gained,

Like a traveler, he passed by,

And soon I see them multiply,

And form the magic number nine,

As she thought it would be great and just fine,

But she don’t know, he’s big and will dominate,

With me, people would have always equate,

She’ll soon be the number I always wanted to be,

Alas! I’ll be left lamenting and lonely, like the square root of three.

 

P.S. :: Don’t waste time wondering who the other square root of three is and who is that three root three.

 

Quote of the Day:: You may have got better looks, better style and better attitude, but at the end of the day you are only, 5 feet 4 inch. Though it’s useless, but when it comes to doing things, “Size does matter”.

My first Sports Blog

Semester is over, vacations have started and the dormant, hibernating beast has finally awakened. Busy working for HAVEINTERN, playing Street Football on facebook, playing with my brute and interning, I thought it’s the right time to bring my first ever sports blog concentrating mainly on the success of MANCHESTER UNITED this season and the IPL-II which ironically, was won the HADDU’s.

 

Paragraph 1: The Red Devils, MANCHESTER UNITED

                The season didn’t start bright for the European Champions as they managed only 2 point in three outings and where lying 17^th in the table. Defeats to rivals like Liverpool, Arsenal and a draw at the Stanford Bridge, worried the fans. Everyone feared the worst ever finish under Sir Alex Ferguson. But suddenly, some sort of spirit evoke in Edwin Van der Sar and he became stubborn and adamant of not conceding a goal and he actually did so for 15 games. Meanwhile, the Red Devils became the Champions of the World, thanks to Wayne Rooney goal. It was Boxing Day, mid-season and Manchester United were at the top of the League Table. New Year started with demolition of Chelsea at Old Trafford and the winning of the LEAGUE CUP final. Suddenly there were back to back defeats in the premier-league (after four years) but it lead to the emergence of Frederico Macheda as the super-sub whose last minute strikes in two games won them those game. While they were looking certain for the third consecutive League title, there was more development on the European front. They became the first English team to beat Porto in Porto, thanks to the 35m strike from Christiano Ronaldo and also brought an end to the unbeaten European run of Arsenal at the Emirates, again Christiano Ronaldo’s brilliant skills and back-heels. Now they face Barcelona in the finals, who qualified thanks to the referee who denied infinite legitimate penalty claims to Chelsea. They eventually won the Premiership on 16^th May at Old Trafford and seek a “Double Double” at Stadio Olympico on the 27^th May.

                Its SHOWTIME on Wednesday, the World Champions MANCHESTER UNITED takes on the newly crowned Spanish Champions BARCELONA to become the first team to successfully defend its European Crown.

 

Paragraph 2: IPL-II 2009 at South Africa

                While football was the need of the hour in Europe, cricket was screaming loud in Africa and Asia. The Indian Premier League was back with more enthusiasm, more thrill, more cheerleaders and more Bollywood celebs. Royal Challengers Bangalore started their campaign brilliantly defeating the last year champions Rajasthan Royals by a huge margin but they started losing again and was back to winning ways. Indian seniors were playing brilliantly, scoring runs at a strike rate of more than 100. Delhi was looking the strong favorite and despite without the Pigeon, they were simply awesome. Misery continued for Kolkata Knight Riders, considered as Manchester United of IPL as they were unable to find the winning combination. They did nothing useful than knocking out Champions Rajasthan Royals and King’s XI Punjab out of the semi-finals. This season of the IPL, saw the revival of eventual winners Deccan Chargers and finalist Royal Challengers Bangalore from their last season’s finish. There was a bottom’s up. RCB managed 7 out of 9 victories under the leadership of Indian legend Anil Kumble enroute to final where they lost to DC by 6 runs. Looking at the stats, the BEAST made certain predictions for the IPL ::

1.  The team jersey colour should be blue, if the team needs higher probability of winning IPL.
2.  The team that will defeat Delhi Daredevils in the semis will be the winner.
3.  Moreover, the team that has a retired Australian player as captain will eventually be the winner.
4.  Apart from the captain, the team should have an Australian all-rounder and a South-African opener.

Hence, if we go by the this year’s bottom’s up approach we can expect Kolkata Knight Riders and Mumbai Indians in the semis but if we look at the above mentioned facts, then Mumbai Indians will win the tournament if ::

1.  Sachin steps down from captaincy.
2.  JP Duminy becomes regular South-African opener.
3.  They buy themselves a retired Australian player and a working Australian all-rounder.

And Kolkata Knight Riders will win if,

1.  They change their team jersey to blue.
2. Ricky Ponting retires from all forms of cricket and SRK hands him the captaincy.
3.  They hire themselves a South-African opener.

Till then, ciao.

 

P.S. That was my first sports blog, you might have found it boring.

 

Quote of the Day :: The dog is the only thing in the world, that loves you more than you love yourself.